The snow is coming Or so they say, “Maybe tomorrow, Or another day.” A calculated guess Is as good as it gets When the meteorologist says, “You may just get wet!” Sun, rain, or snow “There’s a chance of black ice!” A little more certainty Sure would be nice But unpredictability Is what New Englanders… Read More A Calculated Guess
If there is ever a year The bells don’t jingle There is no red suit To warm Kris Kringle The reindeer have gotten Too fat to fly The Christmas Star fails To sparkle in the sky The gingerbread men Make all the children sick Tongues stick like glue To peppermint sticks Presents disappear (Poof) From… Read More Mishaps and Mayhem
It’s that time again When Hallmark movies premiere To make the season festive With their formulaic cheer Most start in a big city With a perky, feisty gal Who must soon return To some small-town locale Soon after arriving She learns the bad news Her family’s business They’re all about to lose But this new… Read More Hallmark Movie Magic
Freddy the fly Stole the show As politicians bragged About what they know He made his landing On Mike Pence’s head And stayed so long He appeared to be dead But after two minutes And a few seconds more He flew to find Another head to explore
Common sense says Bring an umbrella When the forecast says rain Don’t hike that mountain When you’re already in pain Stop eating When you’re stomach is full If the door says “push” Do not “pull” Look both ways Before crossing the street Hot summer pavement Will burn bare feet Lack of sleep Will make you… Read More Common Sense
If you find a gremlin In your coffee There are a few things You shouldn’t do: Don’t drink it After midnight Or when the sun is Shining through When ice cubes start to melt Be very concerned Don’t get them wet Is the last rule we’ve learned Good coffee goes bad Once gremlins have… Read More Gremlin In Coffee
You’re one to rely on In times of change Now even you, Coffee, Taste a bit strange You’re no longer smooth You seem a bit sour Like you’ve been in the pot For too many an hour You’re bitter, Coffee, Right from the drip I like you less The more I sip
Don’t breathe too deeply Be careful what you touch A group of ten May be too much Wash your hands While singing happy birthday Watch the news For a countdown to doomsday You can’t dine in But drive-throughs are open Because of social distancing Work and schools are closing Try not to touch your… Read More Six Feet
Since toilet paper is trending In popularity this year I can’t help but wonder What baby names we’ll hear Surely, they’ll be Charmin A little girl to adore All will hug and squeeze her Until her parents say no more Cotton and Elle Multipacks are better than one A boy and a girl Will… Read More Toilet Paper
Empty gift boxes Wrapping paper balls Stale crumbly cookies Pine needles fall Smashed ornaments Candles burnt out Adults bicker Children pout Piles of dirty dishes Half-eaten yule log Yellow snow Thanks to the dog Holiday hangover Spiked eggnog
